You never get use to flashbacks and you never get use to being raped. This is my first day on this site and I found your post. I was raped over many years by the same person and even though it has been 11 years since it ended I still have flashbacks. Crazy moments where I yell at my husband. Over time you learn not to feel embarrassed. Time is the key, that and talking about it. I know it's all easier said than done but let go of what you can and work on what you cant.